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Let me tell u about this friend of mine. I'll name him Baymax cause he's cute

He's a good guy, at least the nicest guy I've ever met. I think next November mark our one year of friendship isn't? But we don't talk anymore. God i miss him.

Things happened last month,
Imagine, I've been waiting for like 2 months to meet him, go on a trip together, we planned things like what should we pack, what should we do and we even paid for the deposit, but the trip got cancelled last minute. And the worst part is, he didn't even bother to inform me that. How cruel is that? No explanations, no clarifications, no sorry. Then he came out with some stupid excuses which obviously a lie. God know how mad I am at the moment so i was like blocked him on every socmed cause I don't wanna know a shit about him anymore. Know why? Cause he did that because of a girl. I knew it. I'm a good stalker eventually i'll found out everything without people telling me. God is surely the greatest He showed me what i need to see. Then I realize, I was so wrong about telling myself that he is the nicest guy I've ever met. And plus I HATE IT THE MOST WHEN A GUY LIE TO ME

So I decided i wanted to unfriend him. I can't be friend with someone like that. But lemme tell u this, the process ain't easy. It's been a month and it's s fucking hard to not remember a thing about him. I mean like we go to some places together quite often, movies, mcd. How can I not remember him whenever i go to the same places with my friends. I swear that was like the hardest things to do in moving on. I'll always pray so that I won't bump into him wherever I go and I don't feel safe walking alone. Cause I can't imagine how would i react if I happen to bump into him. Will I yell at him? Slap him? Punch his face? I don't know. I am that kind of girl that can be so under control when I'm mad. I can barely think when I'm mad, i'll just do anything my body want to, it's like out of control.

Well at least, if he being honest to me, it would hurt less isn't? How irresponsible of him to do that. That is so immature.

I don't feel regret knowing him cause he brings me the lessons. So the next time I met someone like him i can just hit em with a car before then get to do shits to me.

No, I mean, when we were friends, he's being nice to me. Sure there's time when he's not but lets just talk about his good sides. He once told me to do sunat prayer whenever i woke up before dawn, he asked me to read al-mulk, tell me about religion things and all, and I was like, wah he sure make a good husband someday. He gave me good advices, on how I should not give up on my studies. Keep company me the whole night when I was studying for my finals. He wake me up with a call once. I miss that.

I remembered we planned to break ifthar together but then it was kind of late so he just stop at bazzar, park his car by the road and we go buy foods and have our ifthar outside of his car which is by the road and I swear it was so embarrasing. But yeah i don't mind as long as it is with him. I love doing everything with him. Then we once ride a bus together from pahang to kl and kl to pahang. And I swear that's when i feel the safest riding a bus cause he is there next to me.

Shit i wanna write more but Mak just asked me to do chores. I'll write more soon.

Dude i miss you doh wish we can fix all these mess